A Letter To The Man Who Loves Me Next: Don’t Take Me For Granted
Sorry for writing you this so early; I probably haven’t even met you yet. But I wanted to ask something from you. A little favor: Don’t take me for granted.
People took me for granted too many times in my life. They would assume that I would be there for them forever, without them putting in even a little bit of effort. I don’t wish for you to do the same thing. Not because I am arrogant and I want you to be thankful for every nice gesture I do but rather because I want you to realize that I am worthy of your invested time and energy. I am worthy of love and appreciation.
I will give you the world. I will do anything that will bring you happiness, but it won’t be like that forever if you decide that being there for me too is a burden. I will be there for you to the point where you make me question my own worth. I’ve been through that too many times. I will probably continue to love you, but you wouldn’t believe how strong I can be—strong enough to walk away when I love you the most.
It’s what life has taught me.
You won’t be able to see my reaction when someone texts me, my disappointment when it’s not you. You won’t see the way I smile every time I see you walking toward me or the face I make when I smell your new cologne. But that’s OK. I want you to enjoy the way I treat you when we’re out with friends and the way I respect you when you need time alone.
It’s not something I’d say to everyone out there, but I do want you to do these same things for me, too. I won’t get mad if you forget that sometimes I need more attention than usual, and I won’t get mad if you forget our anniversary. But I will get mad if I see your behavior turning into manipulation, if you start using me or if you start treating me like I will forever be there for you, no matter the cost.
I have been used so many times, believe me. I have been through so many relationships and friendships where people never appreciated my efforts and I would like, for once in my life, to see someone putting effort into keeping me by their side and in their life. I don’t need you to throw parties and buy me flowers every time we see each other. I don’t want you to spend your entire day with me when you have loads of work to do.
I simply want you to appreciate the work I put into the relationship and for you to do so at times of need.
I would also want you to know that there will be times when I will be the one not putting effort into anything, for this or that reason. But try to understand, just like I will try to understand you. We need to stick together to make it through the rough times, through the hard times, but we can make it, together!
Love doesn’t have to hurt, but love does need a lot of effort. So don’t look at me confused, don’t look at me like I’m an alien. I’m talking here with the utmost respect.